I Cut Meat

I have been collecting quotes recently, because I like that sort of thing. And if there's one thing I love to do with those quote, is butcher them. Not in the best of mood as of late, I have been reading through a small book my mother gave me after... lets say life hadn't gone too well... called 'Hope comes' or something, a collection of famous quotes or proverbs all to do with hope. But of course I find it hard to believe in hope.

So here are my versions of these quotes, I have 'butchered them' to reflect my downcast view of life or to give you a glimpse of what I feel. Um, enjoy?

You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it. –Margaret Thatcher

You will have to fight battles more than once, and won't necessarily win. –Nattoons

When you get to the end or your rope, tie a knot and hang on. –Franklin D. Roosevelt

When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot. Then jump. –Nattoons

One who wants a rose must respect the thorn. –A Persian proverb

One who wants a rose will only ever get the thorn. –Nattoons

…no evil lasts forever, nor indeed for very long. –Epicurus, 271 BC

No evil lasts forever, but indeed for a hell of a long time. –Nattoons

It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves. –Sir Edmund Hillary

You will never conquer a mountain or yourself, you pathetic bum. –Nattoons

Tough times don't last – tough people do. –Anonymous

Tough times seem to last forever, but don't worry, you won't. –Nattoons

The pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist, the opportunity is in every difficulty. –L. P. Jacks

The pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist is severely delusional. –Nattoons

I may cry easily but I never give up. –Greg Louganis

I can't cry even though I need to, and my only option left is to give up. –Nattoons

No man fails who does his best. –Orison Swett Marden

Your best is never enough. –Nattoons

Inside myself is a place where I live alone and that's where you renew your spring that never dries up. –Pearl Buck

Inside myself I am constantly alone and that causes more and more suffering every day. –Nattoons

May you live all the days of your life. –Jonathan Swift

But I don't want to. –Nattoons

If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain. –Dolly Parton

The rainbow is overrated. –Nattoons

Fall Seven times. Stand up eight. –Japanese Proverb

Fall seven times. You're an idiot for doing the same thing over again. –Nattoons

Be realistic. Plan for a miracle. –Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh

Be realistic. An hero. –Nattoons

Well that's it from me I guess.

Signing off,

~Nattoons

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"The lies we tell other people are nothing to the lies we tell ourselves."

-Skulduggery Pleasant, Skullduggery Pleasant Book 6: Death Bringer